Fear and Loneliness in Los Angeles

     She spent her last three Friday's in good company. Apart from repetitive Hulu commercials and the inevitable sorrow discovered amongst the sediment at the bottom of a bottle of merlot, she enjoyed them. Her friends, solitude and security, kept the frustrations of catfish and sleaze bags at bay while offering enough rest to recharge from a demanding six day work week. As rewarding as the ritual had been, she needed to branch out at least once a month, if not to satisfy her mom's weekly inquest then to supplement the cabinets' waning supply.

 
     Just three years ago she successfully completed a marathon in anticipation of her 30th. Date after date she trudged on but instead of running the requisite mileage she met and refused 26.2 men in a matter of months. The ancient pressure to find a man in time to have a family, tormented her for a season, when Los Angeles proved an unproductive source for qualifying gentlemen. Her second glass felt heavy and dark. She asked to go home but he acted like everything was okay. She moved back to avoid his kiss and standing, asked again if they could return home. The next hour she played the part enough to get back and his insistence disregarded every word she spoke.
 
     Calls and texts too vile to recall, lined her inboxes, and somehow her sympathy kept the secret. Too close to point a finger and too modest to see this worthy of speaking up about in light of stories she'd heard before, she deleted his number and forgot she'd met him. Harder to forget however, was the wolf still prowling. She felt he'd locked her in a castle of fear there'd be more, and continued to stalk, not hearing, unyielding. Tonight she came down again. Years later and miles beyond any societal plea to marry, with hope for relationship. Just remember her strength gentlemen, a man like yourself made this date a courageous effort, are you worth it?